Things are so much better than they were two weeks ago. I have been keeping my cool with the kids, and the kids themselves are so much easier.

Well, Julian is about the same, but Adrian is WAY easier, and when Adrian is not working my every last shredded nerve, then Julian is fairly easy to handle.

The big difference? Communication. Adrian can suddenly COMMUNICATE. Not like he's speaking in full sentences or anything, but he really gets his point across. I want it, I don't want it, I prefer the other one, I'm thirsty, I'm hungry, I have to go potty, I'm tired, I dropped my toy on the floor and need you to help me get it, I want to show you something, look at this, come here, that is Daddy's shoe, that is Mommy's bag, I like that ball, etc.

Adrian uses a combination of sign language and speaking and gestures, and it's pretty awesome. Before, he would scream to indicate no, or scream with frustration we weren't understanding him. Also, his own comprehension was not nearly as good. Now he really understands what we say to him, and is generally cooperative.

He has quite the large vocabulary at this point. When he's sitting on his potty we read books (which he asks for by saying "eh?" and making the sign for "book"), and his favorites are word and picture and ABC books. I will ask him, "Where is the LION?" or "Where is the HELICOPTER?" and he almost always points to the right image. There are hundreds of pictures in the books we have, so he knows a ton of words by now. Very impressive for an 18 month old.

He doesn't *say* too many actual words verbally, not identifiable ones anyways. There's Mommy, Daddy, and Doggie. Let's see what others I can think of off the top of my head:
Eat, Drink (dink!), Yes , No, I Want That, Baby, Door

Door is the newest one. He points to a door and says it. Kind of random that he would pick that word, but there it is. There could be many other words that he's saying, but because he natters on a lot and it's all kind of jumbled up, it's hard to catch them sometimes. But his gestures and intonations are all spot on.

He likes to sing "Twinkle, Twinkle" to himself with the following lyrics:
"Mommy, Daddy, Doggie, Mom...Daddy, Doggie, Mommy, Mom"
Incredibly cute. He's very musical, that baby boy.

Adrian still has no name for himself, and no name for Julian. He was very excited looking at a family portrait of the four of us today, and I pointed to each person and asked him who they were. Mommy, Daddy, no problem. Pointed to him...silence. I know he can say "Baby", so I suggested that, but he didn't repeat it. Silence when I pointed to Julian as well. "Julian" is hard to say, so I suggested "Juju", but he wasn't repeating that either. We'll see what he comes up with.

Less screaming and more conversing makes for a much more relaxed parenting experience, and a happier household overall. Adrian has his 2-year molars coming in , and they are hurting him, but overall he's still very happy and smiley and quite witty too. He has suddenly become ticklish, and loves to be tickled under his arms and in the crook of his neck. He cracks himself up by farting.

Julian is moving along to his next developmental phase quickly too. Today we were listening to Cachao in the car on the way to IKEA for lunch. Cachao was a Cuban guy known as the inventor of the mambo, and the music is mostly old-school Afro-Cuban jams that get your booty shaking.

As soon as I put the CD on, Julian said, "Oh, I LIKE this CD." Then he thought for a moment and asked me, "Is this music African?" I was surprised and said, "Well, actually it IS African. It's Cuban, and Cuban music is a lot like African music, even though they sing in Spanish." I wasn't really sure how to describe it simply enough, but I think he understood.

I asked him how he knew the music was African and he said he wasn't sure, he just knew. He usually says at least one thing a day that surprises me...uses a complicated word in correct context, or discusses a subject in a very sophisticated, aware way. He' s still very small for his age, which makes it all a bit more surprising when he talks like such a big boy. And then he'll completely melt down over some tiny thing and all of a sudden it's like he's a 2 year-old again. Such an age of extreme behavior.

There has been a burst in helpfulness too. All of a sudden he can dress himself and put on his shoes and socks, and pick up toys and books and put them away. He doesn't LOVE picking things up and putting them away (yeah, me neither), but he's helpful if I stay on top of him and guide him gently to what needs to be done next. He likes to help me make applesauce, and can do every part of the apple peeling/coring process with my peeling/coring machine, except actually putting the apples on the prongs, because the prongs are sharp, and because the apple has to be perfectly aligned on them. But otherwise? He does it all, and I just throw the resulting apple slinkies in the kettle, season them with lemon juice and cinnamon sticks, stir, and wait. We're a Badass Applesauce-making Team.

At other times there is just zero focus, of course. It's surprising what he can do when he is motivated, and how little he can do when he is just not in the mood.

Dan took Adrian and Bugs for a walk last week and Julian stayed home to help me with some gardening. He was supposed to pick cherry tomatoes, but he lost interest after about two minutes. Granted, he had been at summer camp most of the day and was a little tired, but he likes to pick fruit, so I was surprised when he said he was done so quickly.

I asked him if he wanted to pick beans instead and he said "OK". But no sooner had I walked back over to the place where I was planting chard than he was done with that task too. "Mommy, I'm DONE. My feet are tired of standing up and picking these beans." Instead he wanted to help me dig holes for the chard, but then when I set him on that task he wanted to punch holes in the drip irrigation system. Whatever he thought he wanted do to, it only lasted a minute before he wanted to move on to something else.

I teased him that he wasn't a very good farm boy, since a real farm boy would be working from morning to night picking beans and tomatoes and milking cows and feeding chickens and lots of other things besides.

He said, "I AM a farm boy. I AM." I asked him how he could be a farm boy when he didn't want to work for even five minutes on our little farm, and we still had to pick tomatoes and beans for our dinner. If we didn't do our little tiny bit of farm work tonight, then what would we eat?

He looked at me and said, "Mommy, don't you need to go to Trader Joe's anyway? While you are there you can get something for dinner. Then I can be a real farm boy tomorrow when I am not so tired."

Well hmmmm, can't argue with that. Wouldn't fly on a real farm, but luckily our tomatoes and beans weren't like unmilked cows or unfed chickens...they could wait until tomorrow. The chard couldn't really wait one more day to be planted, so I finished that up quickly while Julian played (he DID have energy to play with the hose) and then we went inside.

Speaking of our little farm...

This year I didn't really till up the soil and amend it with compost like I did in past years. I just dug little pits, threw in some compost, and then mixed it up before planting something in each of the little pits.

Well, apparently that totally sucks as a farming technique. In years past my plants have grown tall and lush, and been very productive. This year? Nothing. Everything grew at a snail's pace, and then it all slowly turned yellow and started to die. EVERYTHING. Tomatoes, squash, cucumbers...the only things doing OK were peppers and basil. Not so great, but they were at least surviving.

We have been having a very mild summer (I've had on sweatshirts during the day in August), so that is one factor. I went to the nursery and a very angry chick with a lot of attitude told me that I was watering too much. I should water less.

I figured she was way off, and I was right. I upped the water to twice as much, and dosed everything with a big fat shot of Miracle Grow. No, it's not organic, but I had already given a big dose of organic fertilizer and it was doing zip. Next time I'll mix it into the soil when I am tilling, and do this thing right. But I had to give the Miracle Grow just to keep things alive.

The Miracle Grow was like Veggie Steroids. Within a day my garden was looking revitalized. A week later I had new green growth on all the plants, the few hard, unripe fruits I had were ripening, and in general everything looked about a thousand times better. Dang. Miracle Grow is the bomb.

Lessons learned this week:
1) Kids can change unbelievably fast. It truly seems to be darkest right before the dawn. Also helps to not be a raving maniac.

2) If you hit rock bottom and vent about the darkness on your blog, that seems to speed up the dawning process immensely.

3) When gardening, take the time to do things right. Prepare the soil by tilling it and adding plenty of organic matter and compost to feed the plants later on. Make sure you are giving enough water for each plant. Monitor the situation carefully and be prepared to work hard to fix things if they don't seem to be going right. Don't listen to that bitch at the info counter at Yamagami's Nursery. And finally...if all else fails and you seem to have fucked things up in spite of your best efforts, don't be afraid to use some Miracle Grow to save the day. Try harder next year.

4) Most of the above works for kids as well.

5) Keeping your cool is worth the effort. Everyone wins.