If you've been keeping up with things, you know that South Dakota has outlawed abortion with no exception for rape or incest, and you may have even read Stephanie McMillan's cartoon, suggesting that women call South Dakota Senator Bill Napoli at home to have him make other decisions in our lives as well. SInce, ahem, we're obviously not capable of making even the most basic decisions for ourselves.

Well, Nancy Goldstein has actually taken up this challenge. She called up Bill Napoli to ask him whether to put bacon or chorizo in her paella (Neither, duh Nancy!)

See the shocking results here! Not only does Senator Napoli not even know what paella is, he has never heard of Google either. And it was news to him that contraceptives sometimes (gasp) fail!

"What I find interesting is this–because Napoli didn’t know jack about paella or Google, he declined to make Nancy’s choice for her. He probably also correctly assessed he doesn’t know anything else about Nancy’s life that would influence the decision–does she like bacon or chorizo better? Does she have both at hand, or would one require a trip to the store? No doubt this was a wise decision on his part. It’s generally accepted that if you don’t know shit, you shut the fuck up. So there’s no doubt that Napoli can comprehend this idea, that private decisions are best made by the individual who knows the most about the situation.

So if Napoli can grasp that he’s not one to tell Nancy what to make for dinner, then why the hell does he think he can assess the private decisions of more than a million women a year without knowing much about women and definitely not knowing jack shit about their individual lives?"

Right? Whoooooaaaaaaa. Scaaaaaaary that someone so unbelievably clueless holds a position of power over so many lives. And what's even scarier is that South Dakota voters actually elected this clown to office. What gives, South Dakotans?

Then again, the good people of nearby Tracy elected Dick Pombo to office. Good ol' Dick, who is trying to kill the Endangered Species Act, and sell off 15 of our National Parks to industry in order to reduce the deficit. No joke! Even moderate Republicans have their panties in a bunch over that one.