Oh for cryin' out loud.

So I sell these wraps on my Portable Baby website:
http://www.theportablebaby.com/wrap.html

I've only gotten positive comments on the wraps so far, and on the page in general. The wraps are really taking off, and rightly so, because they are really fabulous.

Anyway, in the last two days I've suddenly had emails flaming me for
1) my dissing of other wraps
2) the "offensive profanity" I use

Number one... the other wraps do kind of suck, for the reasons I mention. They're not all bad, but they could be better. I have a right not to like certain features of those wraps, and I'm not alone in my preference. But apparently as a "mommy business" I'm supposed to never, ever say anything bad about anything, and especially not about products that other mommies might use and/or sell. I'm supposed to be nice, nice, nice, and sweet and positive all the time. Mommies are always nice and sweet and supportive and never ever sarcastic or critical.

Well, that's one of my problems with "momness". Moms need to stand up and speak out more often and not always be so darned doormattish, invisible, and inoffensive to absolutely everyone and everything! In fact, that's one of the problems I have with the perception of how women in general should behave. And not just about baby products, but about the current state of the world. There are plenty of issues that moms *should* be getting mad about. Like health care and education and environmental devastation. These moms, for example are keepin' it REAL.

If I were a man with a website about baby products (which hardly exist, with one commendable and entertaining exception) this would be an entirely different story. I could say that a product is not so great, especially when compared to my own fabulous creation. That's business, right? Competition.....oooooohhhh, a scary word for moms. Moms are not supposed to be businesswomen and compete against others in the arena.

But listen, if I *didn't* point out the differences between products, that wouldn't be very useful now, would it? When I go to a website or to a store, I WANT to know how products stack up, and I don't want to hear "You know, they're ALL wonderful in their own way, and I really support them all."

Well why should I buy yours then, when there are ten others that seem the same to me? GIve me the lowdown, dammit. That's the kind of info that I appreciate as a consumer. That's the kind of info I give. Yes, it's my personal opinion. No, you don't have to agree with me. Take what I say with a grain of salt, do the research, and form your own conclusion. But don't get on my case for speaking out about what I think is good and bad, what I like and don't like, and why.

And SECOND of all, since when are "crazy-ass" and "crappy" and "sucks" considered profanity? Where are these people living? Are these the same people that consider the word "butt" profanity? FYI, those words are slang, and I enjoy using slang. So there. I'm very highly educated and I can speak perfect non-slang Queen's English when I choose to, but it's the real me on my website, and I write as I speak. I purposely chose NOT to use a bland "We the corporation" voice in my business, but to be real...one mom speaking her mind and telling you about the products she likes and uses. So suck it.

Personally, I reserve the definition of profanity for words that deserve it. Like "fuck" or "shit". Now if I had said "This shitty motherfucking wrap sucks ass!", I can maybe see people getting upset, but "crappy"? Give me a break, people.

OK, venting over. Aaaargh, freakin' uptight crazy-ass people.

Sesame Street is on and Gloria Estefan is dancing around with the monsters/muppets to a jammin' salsa tune. But she's wearing denim overalls! DENIM OVERALLS! The least flattering clothing item on the planet. No one looks good in denim overalls, and yet there she is, bopping around to a salsa tune in them.

Gloria, the denim overalls aren't you. You're a sexy Latin songstress. I've seen what you usually wear, and it's not denim overalls. What gives? Did someone say to you "It's Sesame Street, look as ugly as possible"?

You know, Maria and Dr. Gina and even Gabby wear stylish clothing on the show. It's not revealing or outlandish or inappropriate, but they wear nice-looking casual outfits. Dr. Gina had a shirt on that I positively coveted in one episode. It was a sort of faux-wraparound neckline, and very chic. So really, you don't have to dress like a dork around kids. I don't ever want to see you in Mom Jeans, OK? Being on Sesame Street is no reason to look homely. Just be yourself next time.

Over and out.