Happier than a Pig in Poop
Notable Quote of the Day:
Niki Yan (aka Niki Cruise), crazy Chinese woman obsessed with Tom Cruise.
My grandma got a bunch pigs running around on her backyard. I totally remember that, cause I even rode a pig one time to practice my horse-riding. Pigs are really useful, they are my grandma’s best friends. We had no toilet paper, so we had to use the tree leaves or dye mud cube to wipe the ass. Sometime, when we’re really bored, I mean if no leaves, or mud, we just let the pig lick instead, that way, we saved the natural resource and did something good for the universe, also a good favor for the pigs. We got our ass wiped and they got what they want, mutual benefit indeed.
I was not so sure the situation here, so when I moved to the US, I brought two luggage of Toilet papers. Well, I was about to bring a pig with me, but he is afraid of height, so I had to leave him at home. I am sure you guys have pigs, but American pigs are probably more aggressive. So fuck it.
Unfortunately I never got a chance to use the cheap toilet papers I brought from China, instead, I fall in love with a Super Star.
Whoa Niki! Do we really need to know that you and your family lets PIGS lick the poop off you asses back home?
On second thought, it's no more embarrassing than admitting publicly that you love Tom Cruise and want to have ten babies with him. Yeccchhhh.


