Mr. Grabby Hands
We have a Mr. Grabby Hands in the house lately. Those miraculous hands. Just a little while ago they didn't do anything at all, really...a pat here and there maybe. Now all of a sudden those Grabby Hands are increasing in skill level pretty much every day. Last week they could slap at a puppy book, now they can reach specifically for the patch of pseudo-puppy-fur on the page. Today they were trying to grab the food off Daddy's plate (see video below). Grabbing things and feeling them out is so much fun!
A real-life puppy is even better. Bugs has become a Fascinating Thing to Julian. He watches him eat, watches him squeak his toy, and reaches out to touch him every chance he gets. Bugs likes Julian too. At first he seemed merely annoyed by the baby, but now he likes him. He licks him, lays down next to him and is very protective if strangers or other dogs are around. They are very cute together.
So yes, today was the first grab for food. Everyone is asking me when Julian is going to start solids, and I have always said, "Whenever he is interested!" So this moment might be coming up soon...stay tuned. I would like to wait until he's a little older, just to avoid allergies etc. And eating solid food is so messy, such a hassle, and I'm also not looking forward to the change in poop. Yech. He has the rest of his life to eat solid food. But hey, if he really wants it, he can have it. Leela, his daycare teacher, suggested that he start a little rice cereal mixed with breastmilk, since he isn't taking his bottle. She thought maybe he would be more interested in taking food from a spoon. That's probably a good idea, since otherwise he gets hungry and very cranky about an hour before I arrive to feed him.
Our baby is laughing out loud! Two very cute videos below show Julian's first episode of Advanced Laughing. Not just a giggle or chuckle, he has been doing those for a long time. This is real side-splitting all-out laughter. Baby busts a gut! What's so funny? Bugs, of course! I was roughhousing with Bugs on the bed, playfighting with him, and Julian was watching entranced. When I looked over to see what he thought of it, he burst out laughing and didn't stop for a few minutes. That silly mama! That crazy dog!
Another recent game is "How many Mamas are there?" We play this in the bathroom while going potty. I stand behind him while he is on his potty on the counter. There is a mirror in front, but also a side medicine cabinet mirror, so Julian can see me from three different angles (there is a diagonal reflection created too). He likes to look at me in front, then look quickly over to the diagonal angle and then the side mirror. I pretend to be surprised to see him each time when I meet his glance, and it's great fun. Every once in a while I mix it up and lean around his side to give him a kiss on the cheek. Wow, yet *another* Mama! Guaranteed to make everyone laugh.
Whew, babies are super-funny! Who knew? It's a daily laugh riot around here. Well, when we're not crying, we're laughing. It's like living with a mini manic-depressive. Such high highs, and such low lows! And you never know which is coming next. No, actually he's a very happy baby. The only real lows have been due to those crazy teeth busting through his gums. This morning he was back to nursing like a champ, so I guess the teething nursing strike is over now that that second tooth came through yesterday. Poor baby. You know his mouth must hurt when he doesn't nurse well. But we're back to normal now.
His naps seem to be back on track too. We had a very Low Point where I was trying to make him nap without any nursing or rocking because I was thinking I should try to "train" him for daycare. It worked a few times to let him cry a little, then pick him up and put him back down, but then it stopped working altogether. We got somewhat disconnected during this period, the daycare thing was stressing me out so much, and I lost confidence in my mothering abilities. Sleep was never really an issue until I tried to "train" him, and then it became a nightmare. He started to refuse to nap, and I was watching the clock, practically demanding that he sleep at particular times without any of his usual routines and comforts. It was all just really stressful and unnecessary. At the Lowest Moment I tried to let him cry it out alone for a while, after a rough day in which there was much screaming and almost no naps.
Well, the whole "cry it out" thing just doesn't feel right to me. It's not my style, and it wasn't working for Julian either. It just made him hysterical. He even threw up milk through his nose, he was crying so hard. I felt pressure to try it, but never again. No way.
The next day I decided then and there that I had been doing a fine job before all this doubt and fear and stress entered into our lives, it was nothing but harmful, and I was going to go right back to what had been working beautifully before...rocking, holding, nursing, wearing him in a sling, keeping him calm and happy and with a full belly, etc. And if he wasn't sleepy at a particular time, no big deal. He could sleep when he *did* get sleepy.
Bingo, he naps fine now. And now that naps aren't a source or frustration and stress, he goes down really easily and wakes up smiling. Not just for me, but for others as well. The only change that I have made recently is to start putting him to bed around 8:30pm, because that's when he seems to get tired every night. Works great, and gives me some grown-up evening time with Dan as well.
The lesson that I have learned is...I'm a much better mother when I feel connected to my baby, listen to his needs and my own intuition, and stick to what I think is right for us, instead of what other people think is right. When I can do that, everything is smooth sailing. Happy mellow baby, happy mama.


