2 more weeks to go...maybe. It could happen tomorrow. Or it could be a month from now. All the uncertainty is kind of unsettling, but somewhat wonderful at the same time. Baby J will come whenever he's ready, that's just all there is to it.

I got my Gentle Birth tub by UPS about a week ago, but haven't unpacked it yet. I think I am finally finished getting the nursery ready and have absolutely everything that we need for the baby to arrive. We have taken all our classes too: childbirth, breastfeeding, infant/child CPR, and basic baby care. But now I am
obsessed with getting our closets cleaned out and organized. Must get rid of all unnecessary clutter! I'm not even selling stuff on eBay anymore, I just post it to the Freecycle list and give it to whomever replies fist.

I still have two weeks to go supposedly, so I'm not sure when exactly I
should set up the birthing tub. I mean, I'd like to set it up as soon as
possible, but I'm not sure when to fill it. You can leave it filled for
three days (it's heated and filtered) before the water starts to get old. I
guess I'll give it a trial run, the tub seems like a great place to hang out
when I am feeling huge and sore and tired and getting poked/kicked a lot ;-)

I'm going to put the tub in the living room next to our sliding glass patio
door...there is a garden hose right outside so I shouldn't even have to hook
up the faucet adapter, and I'll just drain it into the garden instead of the
sink. I think I still have a big tarp around here somewhere to put
underneath in case of leaks/splashes...

Two favorite links for the day:

1) 6 Myths about Home Births: a very good concise summary that factually addresses most of the
comments/questions that I get about having the baby at home.

2) Birthing pools ease labor pains: Yahoo! News report from today about how birthing pools reduce pain and therefore drug-based interventions.

I have been having a rough couple of days...I feel like a fragile clumsy
eggshell surrounding this vulnerable baby.

We went to go have dinner with some close friends of ours last Friday. Shortly after arriving at their house, their pit-bull/mix jumped up and pounced on me hard out of the blue, got me right on and above my pelvic bone. I freaked out, because it *really* hurt and Julian's head is right there, plus my pelvic seam is already sore. But I think she mostly got me on the bone and just scared me. Baby J is kicking and moving around as usual, but until he moved again after the blow I was terrified for him. My pelvis was sore all that night and the next day, but feels better now. Needless to say, I'm keeping far away from other people's dogs for a while, big or small. It just hasn't been working out for me, between this latest incident and the last...that bad dog-sitting trauma.

Yesterday I was outside walking Bugs on an unpaved trail near our
house and I heard a bike coming up behind me, so I moved over to the right.
Because bikes always pass on the left, duh! In fact, almost always they call
it out ahead of time while still coming up behind you, "Passing on your
left!"

Well, this was some idiot teenage boy and he screeched to a halt and knocked
into my right arm from behind, because he was trying to pass me on the
*right* without saying anything as he came up behind me. A few more inches
to the left and he could have totally knocked me flat! I told him angrily
that he had better call out before he tried to pass people, and what was he
doing passing me on the right anyways? He just rode off. It really shook me
up, and then as I was walking back the other way I randomly slid on some
loose gravel and almost turned my ankle and wiped out. At that point I
started crying and sniffling a little bit, I just felt like a walking disaster waiting to
happen! Ah, hormones....

I don't feel so hot physically either. I am not having contractions or
anything, but some kind of weird random pains deep down in my pelvis. I
think it's just the baby moving, and now that he has dropped down and is
facing inward, he is poking my tender bladder and nerves rather than my
outer abdomen as he has been doing all along. He feels like he weighs a ton.
I'm also starving all the time lately. I wake up in the middle of the night
to pee and then I can't get back to sleep, not because I feel lousy or
anything (I actually feel best when I'm laying down in bed or reclining), but because my mind starts going and I begin thinking about
everything...have I done this and that and this other thing? Then after an
hour or two of laying there I get hungry and have to go downstairs for a
snack. Bugs gets up with me and we usually eat a sliced apple
together, then go back to bed.

Yep, I think this would be a good time to break out the birthing pool and
give it a go, relieve some stress. ;-) I think I might schedule a prenatal
massage too...it would be nice to feel some pleasant bodily sensations for a
change, that might perk me up. I really shouldn't complain, this pregnancy
has been really easy for me compared to some of the stories I have heard
from other women. It's just this last home stretch that is getting to me. But for cryin' out loud, I'm going to complain a little bit and get it out of my system. I'm no whiner, but no martyr either.
I'm tired of being tired, sick of being huge and having to carefully
orchestrate every movement, and plus...I'd like to see what this baby looks
like after carrying him around for this long! There, whining over.

This morning Dan and I put nice cushy waterproof mattress pads on both the
beds, not necessarily for the birth itself, but just in general. I have been
worried that my water might break in the middle of the night and our
wonderful comfy mattress will be ruined (just happened to a woman I know),
plus if the baby sleeps with us and happens to "leak" at any point and not
be on the wool pad that I bought, it's no big deal. That was one of the stupid things keeping me up last night, if you can believe it...gotta get those mattress pads on the beds pronto! Good grief ;-)

OK, time for a funny story. Bugs loves to snuggle up to my belly because it's nice and round and warm. He also sits next to me and puts his paw on my belly to get my attention, and if he's sitting on my lap he actually scooches his butt up to sit on it like it's a stool or something. I always tell him that this baby is going to come out and give him hell for being treated like a piece of furniture.

A few nights ago Bugs and Dan and I were sitting on the couch watching a movie, Bugs was snuggled in with his head pressing against the side of my belly, and all of a sudden Julian started to kick Bugs in the head nonstop. It was hysterical, like "Finally, I'm going to get back at this dog!". Bugs didn't know what was going on, he would lift his head at a big kick, look around, then put his head back down just in time to receive another series of good solid kicks. Obviously they weren't *that* bad, he didn't get up and move away or anything, but it was funny all the same. I grabbed his head and held it in close to my belly and said, "Go on Julian, get that dog! Your time for revenge has come!", and the little kickboxer just went at him. Dan and I were cracking up.

Well, time for lunch. Oh wait, I guess I had lunch already. Um, time for a snack then? Baby J must be growing like crazy right now...I can NOT get enough to eat these past few days!